Hi Silver -- Sometimes I have felt worse leaving counseling, in the depths of depression.

It was almost as if having to talk about it made me confront the awfulness of it -- whereas, alone, I can deny it, zone out on solitare or TV reruns.

Sometimes I left early because talking about the awfulness, even sitting in silence with the awfulness, was too much to bear.

Yet, getting out the house, putting on clothes, brushing my teeth -- this things were good for me. Ya gotta keep putting one foot in front the other, even when it doesn't make any sense to do so.

You are on the right track. The Sufis speak of giving ourselves "the mercy." That is, being as compassionate with ourselves as others are to us. It's hard when we're not used to it. But give yourself some mercy, some praise, for doing what you know needs to be done.

Stretch out in those feelings as if you are a cat experiencing a single ray of sunshine for a half second in the darkness.

Keep going, Silver. You're doing great!

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