Hi there, one day old member so apologies if this is not the right place to post my questions.

Quick background: I suffer from depression, anxiety and AD(H)D. I have been on depression and anxiety meds for several years now. I am 44 years old, male and married with a 9 y/o.

Q1: I have felt guilty about being lazy for as long as I can remember. It takes me a lot to get going on any task, more so, if it triggers some of my issues (e.g. I am supposed to be starting my job search but have been putting it off.) Combination of fear and inertia. Am I a lazy coward?

Q2: I have kept hearing from my therapist(s) and my wife over the years that I need to "get out of my own head" and "think beyond myself". I have been advised to go volunteer to see that "I am not the only one suffering" and that it will help give me some purpose. I will be the first to admit that every time such a thought to go help someone else, or donate to cause or something like that comes up, I say "**** it. I have no money, I have issues and so I am not obligated to help anyone." I know this is a terrible attitude. Am I an asshole, deep down?

Please help! Thank you!!