I registered because your husband sounds very much like me. I'm diagnosed with major recurrent (and treatment resistant, joy) depression, generalized anxiety, and dysthymia. I also strongly believe I'm on the Autism spectrum--what used to be called "High-functioning Autism" or Asperger's.

You didn't mention whether your husband could be on the spectrum, but for me the combination of all of the above results in feeling very close to what you describe him feeling. I'm 38, married, with a 3-year-old. I'd have to say that the only thing I *don't* regularly feel numb about is my child.

I do take medications, though they definitely affect my job (I teach.) I think the side effects of the meds actually add to the feeling of numbness, but having tried just about everything else, this combination is the only one that allows me to function at a level approaching average; without the meds, I have trouble even getting out of bed. With them, I'm emotionally even more blunted than normal, and have a lot of trouble waking up every morning/feel like a zombie during the day.

So I can identify with what he's going through.

I can't offer any real help, other than to say there's at least one other person out there who matches that set of symptoms. What I do know is that, though I've been known to feel numb towards my wife, it's not anything about her--and I assume nothing about you--that prompts the feeling. It's more like having to cope with everything else makes it very difficult to muster any feelings for her. It's certainly not personal.

I hope things get better for y'all.