Thread: Ultimatum for T
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Old Dec 13, 2018, 11:51 PM
Lrad123 Lrad123 is offline
Poohbah
 
Member Since: Nov 2017
Location: United States
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Ididitmyway View Post
No, I didn't because I knew it wouldn't scare them.

If you are not prepared to follow through on your threat, then it wouldn't help you. It wouldn't even give you a temporary satisfaction of feeling powerful because your T would be unfazed by it. It's not a big deal for him to lose you. He won't be terribly upset. But it is a big deal for you to lose him. So, if you make an empty threat, it'd make you feel even more powerless in the end.

You have to make a decision about staying or leaving. If you think the negatives of your therapy outweigh the positives, just leave without saying anything. Otherwise, just stay and accept what you have now, because it doesn't look like your T is someone who welcomes egalitarian discussions and negotiations on how to design the process. He makes all decisions by himself and he gives you little room to wiggle. With this rigid approach, your only choice is to accept it or to get the hell out of there. I'd choose the latter, but that's me.
I agree that although it might feel good for about 30 seconds, I’d feel less powerful in the end, so I probably won’t do it. As for him being rigid, I’m not sure about that. I do think he’s mostly good even though I’m not exactly sure how to articulate it. I suppose it’s a gut feeling. He’s also psychodynamic so part of it is related to that.