Thanks all..

My therapist told me the other day that I was barking up the wrong tree when I tried to have lunch with my pastor's wife because she had disappointed me in the past. Maybe i have a bad habit of continuing to seek approval when its obvious someone doesnt have the time, or desire, or capacity to connect. I think my biggest fear is that I will be alone. I'm rather shy in real life, so when there is someone I know, I'll continue to reach out to them even if they keep rejecting me. Its rather hopeless and stupid, but in a way I just keep recreating my childhool. pain pain pain, but still hoping if I do one more thing, they will care.
So anyways.. You can't make people care about you. I think maybe I need to learn to be comfortable with being alone.

So. Thanks everyone again.