Quote:
Originally Posted by lonelynotalone
I refused and never bothered to do it, as I find the act repulsive. They suggested to me that I view the act from a scientific standpoint and consider that if I were to have kids someday, I need to know what’s going on down below and I need to be able to teach my daughter if I were to have one. Although I did try to see it this way, it didn’t work and ultimately I didn’t end up following through.
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I realize I probably am not going to be better than professional help but...
I think there might be a lot of pressure on you at this point that might not be helping.
First, is there a physical issue? I will just say I remember taking a hormone for an issue and I found my libido. Natural progesterone. It made me realize there could have been a slight hormone issue that wasn't really that noticeable until I took the natural progesterone. You can get that off amazon. Progesterone is what makes you horny.
Secondly, I think you have to make peace with this issue on your own. I am assuming you have never had an orgasm. I think once you do you might change your view. This is easily obtainable alone in the privacy of your bedroom. And typically might not involve penetration. But once you have it you will want another and see how a partner can make it even better.
Thirdly if it is an issue of being .... too tight or worrying about the pain... there are tools that you an easily buy on amazon to get used to the feeling. Vaginal dilators
All the things off amazon come in a plain brown package (not that I have ordered such things
) so there will be no embarrassment.
Is it your partner? I am sorry to say that even guys that I really liked were sometimes not great lovers and what should have been amazing was a chore.
Finally as recommended by people you do really have to master this. I say that because some common medical procedures will require some tinkering down there in very invasive ways. Such as a transvaginal ultrasound which IMHO is just horrible if you aren't... loose down there. As you get older there are more and more invasions down there on a near constant basis. Seriously.
I don't think you should despair or internalize this to you. When I was your age I think I felt much more concerned over the prospect than I do now. I have often wondered if there are changes to women's brains or hormones that change as you get older. One reason they talk about a woman's sexual prime being when they are older. Men's prime is when they are younger. There is no point rushing it. Just try a bit every day. If your partner can't handle it... maybe you need to let him go.