I went to my appointment feeling like I was in a good place. My medication increase seems to have kicked in so feeling better and able to put my mask on. So I was torn between feeling like we could discuss some of the things we have been avoiding because of my mood instability or keeping it really light since it is so close to Christmas and I wont see her again until after the new year.

We opted to keep it very light hearted. We discussed our families and laughed at some of our children's antics. The conversation would just go wherever it happened to go with no agenda. I think she did learn some things about that woul help her in the future but that was not the intention. I felt really good for once. I felt like it helped us work on our bond which for me has been missing.

One thing did arise that I will bring up later. I asked her to stop apologizing if doesnt know something. I told her I don't expect her to remember every detail. I did bring up a couple of months ago when I was upset when she disnt know something about me but I realized it was about me not her. Somehow the conversation led to her saying that I don't seem to have problems bringing things up that are bothering md. From things she said I believe she was slso alluding to when we have a discussing and I go back to it at the next appointment. I wonder if she thinks it is because I am upset with what she said.

That is not it at all. It is more that she has said something from a very different perspective than the past. So after processing it creates more questions. Has anybody dealt with this??An I doing something wrong. One of the things we discussed is that we both are protectionists and hate making mistakes. So wondering if I should let the comment go and if the occasion arises again say something then

Left the appointment in a good place then I got home and was reading a nonfiction book I have been really enjoying. Then she brings up her CSA and abandonment and the effect it had on her even as and adult. Her story was so similar to mine it was eerie. Holy trigger....16 days to hold it together, keep my happy face on and not allow it to effect my holidays.