Welcome to PC. I’m sorry you’re facing such a difficult challenge right now. I wonder about that bipolar diagnosis your husband was given by a therapist and I would be more concerned by that than whether he is gay or not, which many others have already addressed. Are you financially able to move out soon and are your kids old enough that they can be on their own soon? Is it possible to start making plans for your own future? It does not sound like your husband wants to change his behavior.