when I once asked my treatment provider this i was told to look at my past. how have I lived since before I was 5. I wasnt in treatment all those years until i was in college psych class.

by looking at my past I saw that ....

I survived.
I had no idea that I wasnt normal and like others around me
others around me had no idea that I had DID and was not normal
so yea if I wasnt in treatment i would have been fine. life would have gone on as if nothing had happened and I would have lived my life oblivious to my life because I was dissociating. I would have been missing out of things in my life, would not be able to feel emotions, have the memories that I do and so on....

it wasnt fun back in my non treatment days by any means. I was existing, surviving but i was missing out on so much.

my suggestion is reread your past posts when you first joined psych central see how far you have come and decide if you can go back to living life the way you were so many years ago with those same problems happening.

my suggestion is give no treatment a try for a weekend or week or month. dont do any grounding, no relaxation, no what ever you have been doing to heal. not even posting here if being here helps you on a mental of physical level. take time to see what no treatment at all and just surviving is like for you now if you go back to those days of old. this will answer all your questions of what it would be like to give up now.

I do know some that have made that choice and i know some who felt going back to how things used to be would be hurting their self.

for me its a no brainer. I would not give up doing everything that I have learned over the past what ever number of years and go back to just surviving. for me my life and so much better. I also believe that this decision would not only be affecting me but also would affect my wife, children, pets, my job, family and friends. Dissociation problems dont only affect one area of a persons life, its in every part of a persons life even their social, economical, occupation and so much more.

only you can answer what your life would look like with out treatment past/present and future, and whether you would be on skid row, psych ward, invalid, ...