My father was a binge alcoholic and substance abuser. He could go weeks and be straight and then binge for several more. I am a victim of sexual abuse by my father. It lasted over a decade and only stopped when I was in my teens and finally got the courage to say "no". Two other siblings were also abused. My mother knew the whole time but with five kids her excuse was she had no other place to go.

I think this is why my abuse lasted so long because I was so afraid to say anything because that would mean what little family I did have would be destroyed and I would be homeless or sent to foster care.

As an adult, I don't buy my mother's excuse. My counselor was the first to suggest this but I was too afraid to except the truth. My mother is co-dependent and probably a narcissist as well. My ex is a narcissist and until yesterday I couldn't understand what would attract me to someone so manipulating. They say you repeat your childhood issues until you resolve them. I think I took my first step today.