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Old Dec 26, 2018, 11:15 AM
Anonymous56789
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Quote:
my father took his own life when I was a teenager and for a long time afterwards I wondered if I had been better or different or more perfect, if maybe he would have chosen to live.
The way your T works brings these transference feelings to the surface with intensity. Your T works similar to mine, so I think exploring these feelings with your T would likely result in your being as 'perfect' of a client as you can be. Talking about and exploring instead of acting out...

You have discussed feeling abandoned by your T, which in some ways might parallel feeling abandoned by your father. These feelings may manifest in other areas of your life. People pleasing and need for approval are common, but prevent you from being you and instead, leave you enmeshed with others where what others do or feel defines who you are. If your T remains neutral and non-reactive while exploring these feelings, your sense of self and psychological boundaries can be solidified or defined appropriately.

I don't think trying to be the ideal client will work. Why not talk about wanting to be the ideal client, just as you did here? It sounds like you are getting at core issues.
Thanks for this!
LonesomeTonight