Yes, I think I talked about it in a way that is similar to the way I expressed here. But then it ended and it felt unfulfilling. I told him that after my dad died I wished I could have been more like my brother’s high school girlfriend who was beautiful and popular and perfect and loved by all. If I had had some of her qualities perhaps he would have felt like it would have been worthwhile to live. I explained how I once went for a drive in her car with my brother. Even her car was perfect. It was a light blue convertible VW bug and it was warm out, so we drove with the top down. When we got to our destination her beautiful, long, thick blonde hair had been fluffed by the wind, but mine was in tangles that took about 2 hours to get out. I told him I felt that way about our therapy. I imagine all his other clients are like my brother’s girlfriend with perfectly fluffed up hair and after 16 months in therapy, mine is just a big tangled mess. He said something about how she sounded like a Barbie doll and would likely not be someone who’d come to therapy. I just assumed her outer beauty represented her inner beauty as well and that she would do therapy just the right way, which of course includes not sending FU emails. He said life is messy and tangled and not perfect. I don’t disagree, but I did feel unsatisfied by how the conversation ended, like we shouldn’t have been done yet. Any thoughts about what to do about this???