I am not looking for revenge and I know for a fact she will never talk to me again if I report her, so I would not report her for that reason. I had a long conversation with my T about it. I know it’s not for revenge because I actually would feel TERRIBLE reporting her. The main reason I do not want to report her is because I don’t want to hurt her.
At the same time, she was unclear about the boundaries from the beginning. At first, she told me she would think about being friends after therapy ended. She told me she loved me, she hung out in my dorm room, other providers talked me out of switching to a different therapist when I wanted to and was hurt by her (saying ex T was the best at the clinic). In the beginning, m dietician said that ex T loved me and when I asked her if it was more than ex T’s other clients she said yes (I don’t think she had any idea what she was saying). Ex T would pass me notes with hearts during groups. She did this all knowing my history with my previous therapist before her and yet, she still treated me special. When she saw I was taking it “wrong” she dramatically stopped everything (except the I love yous). I told her numerous times during group that I was suicidal but she never checked in with me.
I am feeling a bit judged by people on this forum. I feel like people think I just want to report her because she terminated me suddenly and I’m looking for revenge because of it. I already feel awful about crossing her boundary. I understand what I did was wrong. But can she take responsibility for her part too?
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