You're so right! There is no helping her. She does what she well wants to do and doesn't listen, not even if the whole park tells her she's wrong. She's done that and was sorry not two weeks later. She's most definitely in victim mode in some areas of her life and runs all over people in other areas.

She's in her mid seventies so no amount of telling her or trying to help her is going to change anything.

I rehearsed what I was going to say to her several different ways but they all sounded harsh and hurtful. At her age, she's not going to change. She's just going to stop the next person that walks by and says "Hi" and tell them how she's so put upon. Never could get a word in edgewise with her anyway. If I did, she'd immediately turn it around and made it about her plus 100 times worse that I had it.

No damage done to me and the damage done to the "friendship" isn't on me. It just took me a while to set my boundaries with her because of her age and I was trying to give compassion a chance. It didn't work. Ah, well...