i was out from work for two days with a cold. when i got back to work two of my coworkers (one male, one female) did not even ask how i was feeling. that hurt my feelings because i thought we had a friendly relationship. the woman would often share her food with me and the guy and i talked a lot (mostly about him though). their lack of concern really puzzled me. they talked to me but they never asked how i was. i could kind of understand about the guy not asking as that might be just a guy thing. but the woman.. what has helped me accept their reactions is my belief that you can't force someone to feel something they don't. i used to want people to feel what i felt. if i liked them, i wanted them to reciprocate. but then i thought about people who wanted to go out with me, i would talk with them but i wasn't interested. same concept i guess.

at another job, i had a very unfriendly coworker. i reached out countless times to her and she would always rebuff my attempts at small talk. again, i used to be hurt because i had tried to be so nice to her. in the end, i decided just to be cordial but i stopped the small talk. she eventually apologized and said she was just stressed from all her work. i am really glad i handled this situation the way i did.

this has all been a real life lesson for me.