Ian,
I totally agree with Peanut. When I read that post to the other young guy I was so glad. You reached out to another and I know it may have been hard for you.
As for worrying about sounding stupid when you are posting....quite the opposite. I think you express yourself really well and now that some of that expression has turned away from only being angry I think you may have some really good things to say.
Alot of us are older than you and some of us have kids (I don't) but that just gives us more experience at dealing with life and that may be able to help you alot.
I see in you now someone that wants help and wants to change his life. Stay here with us and keep sharing of yourself. You will find the more you do it here in a safe caring environment the easier it will get and maybe, just maybe it will spill over into your life outside these forums.

I also want to add that I know I was very hard on you in a previous post, I know you know which one. I was just hoping if sweet caring couldn't get thru to you then maybe a good swift kick in the butt would. I apologize if I hurt you. I am glad you are still here and I hope I can be of some help to you in the future.
Heidu

"Rabbit's clever," said Pooh thoughtfully.
"Yes," said Piglet, "Rabbit's clever."
"And he has a Brain."
"Yes," said Piglet, "Rabbit has a Brain."
There was a long silence.
"I suppose," said Pooh, "that that's why he never understands anything."