He refuses to go to the doctor for a diagnosis, but it is obvious. He has admitted that other people have told him he must have it, including ex-partners and his parents. After I realised (at about the 3-month stage) everything fell into place. He has tics and OCD issues too, so he can be very challenging and I have had to adapt to dealing with some of his behaviour.

Sadly he won't even talk to me about how he feels and he has no idea how to respond to negative emotion from me, so there's no way he'd talk to a stranger. Unless he's the one experiencing a particular emotion, it's like he can't understand how anyone else can be feeling that way.

It wasn't at the beginning, but over a year into our relationship that he told me that. In the first couple of months (honeymoon stage) he was asking if I'd ever marry again, calling me Mrs O etc, as if a future with me was on his radar.