You will always remember but you do not always have to be traumatized by the remembering.

All loss hurts us and has to be worked through. But life continues. I doubt very seriously that many of the children in the school today have been specifically told.

Is there any marker or monument at the school, a "garden" or anything?

http://www.auburn.wednet.edu/homepag...ialgarden.html

http://www.childrensmemorialandgarden.org/index.asp

If there isn't something, maybe you could start a little process going where one is created? Doesn't have to be a garden like the above, but could be just a bronze plaque or little statue of a child playing.

Maybe working on something like that would soothe you some? Help you remember and grieve with the others who care and who there must be, as you say.