My thought is that this person shouldn't be treating trauma. I am so sorry. Your experience is normal, and ideally your T should have given a kind of informed consent -spirited conversation about how this can happen. My trauma T is very strict, but in that case he likely would write back something like " this is something for us to talk abut on Wednesday , and we will get to the bottom of it together". Some t's view ethics as not trying to hold on to a patient against their will, so benefit of the doubt is they have feelings of wanting you to stay, but they wanted to go by the boo.
Quote:
Originally Posted by GretchenC
Long time lurker, first time poster.
In therapy for 3 months. My T is very by-the-book; no emotion, no validation, strict boundaries, no texts/emails/calls. We've been doing trauma stuff. I feel like my anxiety is better, but depression is worse. Kind of like debriding a wound. Short-term relief, but then worsening of depression as I'm left with a gaping hole that I don't know what to do with. So I sent an email to my T saying that bringing up traumatic stuff made me feel broken, that I felt like I was getting worse instead of better, and that I didn't think this was the process for me.
As soon as I sent it, I thought OMGwhatthellamIdoing? That this is probably resistance, or transference, or some combo platter of the above.
But as I was drafting an OMGWTHAID email, I got a response back, telling me good luck in the future. That was it. Goodbye and good luck.
So now what do I do? I feel like I would need to do some groveling in order to go back. But I also don't want to 'start over' with another T and have to talk about all this trauma stuff again.
Thanks in advance for your insights.
Gretchen
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