Thanks healingme4me.

And sarahsweets thank you for your answer! Sorry for your family, by the way, but I'm glad you're better now.
I never thought our relationship was unhealthy, I admit it upsets my heart. My boyfriend also has « some abandonment issues » so he doesn't blame me for my behavior that he may have too. I don't see a doctor or therapist because I don't know if I need one: I have other problems (emotional problems, roller coaster motivation, I hurt myself a lot...) so I've been thinking about a psychologist recently. Nevertheless I am still dependent on my parents so it's a little complicated.