I think this is the right place to put this. Just need to get this out, it might help me to understand it.

I've had this weird fetish since my teens, it's for a certain situation not an object. I don't want to say what it is because it's a bit gross and weird, and I've never heard of anyone else having it. But I've somehow managed to add this to my daydreams about the obsession objects. I've put it into a few other obsession daydreams before but only a bit. I've put it into a few other obsession daydreams before but only a bit.

If anyone is reading this, this thread will explain the obsession problem I have: https://forums.psychcentral.com/anxi...ng-stupid.html and more about it here https://forums.psychcentral.com/copi...hing-i-do.html

But with this current obsession, it fits better to that, so now I feel like nearly all the daydreams I have of that, have this fetish in too. It feels wrong and gross. It feels good at the time, when I'm fantasising, but then afterwards, and especially when I go to look at pictures of the object, I feel ashamed and just wrong. I really don't like it, I wish I could get rid of it (and this obsession problem too!).

Now if I really had this object, I'd really want to act out these fantasies, but I think it might damage the object. There might be a way to avoid that but I'm not sure. So I probably wouldn't want to do it anyway, for that reason. That might cause some frustration though, because I would have to still stick to the daydreams, where it can't actually be harmed. But then I can never have this object anyway, so I don't need to worry about that.

But, I sometimes do worry about it in the daydreams, even though it doesn't matter. Sometimes they get so intense and I get so caught up in them that I do worry about damaging the object. I also daydream about telling fake people about what I have done to get a reaction. It's something that wouldn't really be a fetish to most other people, so they wouldn't think about it in that way. To them it would just be abusing it, like the other daydreams.

I don't really understand it. I don't understand much about this obsession problem.