I'm currently in IOP myself. They don't have a number here for us to call. They say to call the national suicide hotline or use the text line. You are lucky. If you need it use it. Suicide is never the answer. Sometimes being impatient is best. I would go back if I felt I need to. Everyone has a different experience in the hospital. Mine was good. I liked the group therapy sessions and visiting with the other patients. A lot of them were my age. My favorite was the art therapy. I painted a ceramic owl bank. I got to take it home with me. We played games and I even won a few prizes. One was an adult coloring book and some colored pencils. I don't know what your experience was like,, but I liked mine. Give it a try. It might not be so bad. Just get help.