What is our purpose here on PC? My understanding is that it is a forum to provide support to folks dealing with mental health issues. I do not perceive the role of PC members as to moralize or determine who is "guilty" and who is innocent. You appear to be very triggered by this thread. Perhaps it would be helpful to take a step back and relax a while.

You say you are frustrated that DanceEngine hasn't changed or "fixed" her life. Why are you frustrated by that? It is not the goal of PC members to change each other. She is an adult and we must respect her boundaries. We can provide support and non-judgmental advice but shaming (even if prefaced with "this might be rude but" etc) does not serve the goal of the PC forum. We aren't here to change people or play judge and jury of their life choices. Have you ever made mistakes? Have you always done everything perfectly right? I know I haven't.

My post was not to "let someone off the hook" as you put it nor was it to moralize and judge and shame. It was to provide healthy tips to someone who is struggling. An experienced therapist could help DanceEngine work through the complex feelings related to the affair. And I feel quite certain that an effective therapist would not deem it appropriate to denigrate her, her life, or her choices.

I believe that Twitter and other such forums are where people openly and bluntly condemn or praise others. I do not think that is the goal of PC threads. With respect, I encourage you to ask yourself why you feel the need to judge this person rather than kindly and calmly support? Your "strong reaction" is not about DanceEngine or about me. It is about something that was triggered within you.