You don't have to buy anything what anyone else says. I'm writing based on my own understanding which has developed based on the things I've experienced in my own therapy and what I've read in books that made sense to me etc.

I also suppose that the sample of therapists we've had the luck to try is very different. I've only experienced working with two therapist (I've seen more but their style or the way they worked did not make sense to me and so I never saw them longer than once) and my understanding what therapy is is based on these two examples. I absolutely wouldn't hesitate to recommend these two men to anyone with severe trauma or neglect.