I was absolutely terrified of being hospitalized for many years. I knew it was likely to happen eventually and that my therapist would have preferred I was in the hospital a few times while my pdoc tried other things to keep me out.

I wound up going on an MAOI and needing to make the transition from my tricyclic IP (not always the case but for me it was needed). So I knew for a month or so that I would be going in and by the time it happened I was so miserable that I was a lot more willing than I ever thought I'd be. Since then I've been in a total of 5 times.

It's not so bad. Each time it has been a relief to be somewhere safe and to get med changes that I know will help. My hospital treats people very well and tries to keep it as interesting as possible. It is nothing like any fear I ever had before.

I hope you never have to experience it but chances are that if you do what you are thinking about it is unlikely to be true.