This is a very belated "in session Thursday" because I took notes on my phone right after but haven't typed it out until now. Some things that happened, not in any particular order:

awkward few minutes of silence when I was unable to bring myself to say what was going on and he wouldn't ask questions because he's stubborn

I brought up him being affected by the stuff I said in the previous session. I asked "why"
he answered slowly and thoughtfully, saying he has a visceral reaction to seeing someone being abused, went on to say I was abusing myself. He said he told me because he thought it would be helpful for me to know.

I brought up that he cares about me. He confirmed this. I said I felt like he shouldn't, that I shouldn't be allowed to have a therapist who cares about me. He kind of half jokingly said that's a problem then because he does.
I said I felt like I'd tricked him into caring. He said he didn't think so, didn't get the impression that that was my intention. I tried to explain that it wasn't, but I still wanted him to care about me, and he was like "so then you feel that you must have tricked me" and I said yes.

I tried to explain that wanting to be cared about feels "dirty" and disgusting and shameful and wrong. I prefaced it by saying I don't mean the word with the usual connotations, there's just no other good word.
He said it's natural and normal to want to be cared about. He said that therapy is being really vulnerable. Then he started to bring up that usually as adults the level of vulnerability or whatever is associated with romantic relationships and it's natural that... and I was like, that's not what I mean. That's what I meant by not the usual connotations.
He was confused.
Eating disorder tw:

He kind of started going down the road to that topic and I redirected/refocused saying it wasn't really the point, my point was just about using the word "dirty" without the usual connotations. I told him that it feels like there's a moral element to not needing things.

At some point when I was saying I thought I was faking my reaction or exaggerating or being melodramatic or whatever he said he wished he could videotape me and show me how I looked at that moment, curled up in a ball, unable to even look up. He may have had a point there. I was actually kind of shaking by the end of the session :/

I asked about him thinking I had been weak. He said he thought I'd actually actually been pretty damn strong for standing up to my father.

I pointed out, once again, that so many other kids had it worse and I'd never even been hit. He said that what my father did hurt just as much as being hit but didn't leave bruises or broken bones. Said that my mom's emotional distance compounded that effect.

We danced around the word trauma. He'd made some comparison to PTSD and I said that was different because in that case there are actual real measurable physiological changes. It's involuntary and hard wired in the brain. He said he thinks this stuff probably caused permanent physical changes in my brain and things like elevated cortisol levels (I didn't correct him that actually people with PTSD/trauma tend to have lower baseline cortisol, it's about reactivity and return to baseline and whatever...)
I asked him if he really thought so and he said yes.
He still didn't use the word trauma though. So I don't know whether he adheres to a narrow definition of it, and I'm afraid to ask.