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Old Mar 09, 2008, 10:17 PM
HurtAndConfused HurtAndConfused is offline
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Member Since: Mar 2008
Posts: 2
My 'husband' and i live common law. I was 9 months pregnant with our daughter when his mothers dog bit my son (from previous relationship) in the face (Sept 2007). He received about 40 stitches under his left eye - his lower eyelid had been completely ripped open. I was absolutely devestated about my sons injuries. We were in the hospital 4 days, and I have to leave my job early to care for my son. His mother never apologized to me for the incident, and since my son was only walking past the dog, and the bite was completely unprovoked I truly believe she should have put the dog down. So did the animal control and police in our town - they went to her home and requested her to do so, warning her that she would be brought to court if she did not do so willingly. She refused to put the dog down.

My husband has refused to talk to me about this. A week after the dog bite, we were both visiting our parents and in a phone call he threatened to leave me if I didnt ask the cops to stop hounding his mother. He told me that he wanted to leave me, and was angry that I didn't want his dog (not the one who bit) live in our home because I was scared for our new baby. We managed to continue on until now somehow - but I just cant take it anymore. I have continually tried to talk to him about my feelings about what happened to my son, as well as how his mother handled the situation. He has done nothing to make it any better, and even complained that I wanted him to stay with our family on Christmas Eve - his mother was having family over - but I will not go to the house with the dog there, and I feel uncomfortable just being around her since she doesnt feel she needs to apologize for what her dog did. I have seen her only twice since them, and both times I tried to be as civil as possible out of respect for my husband - but I also tried to avoid contact with her as much as possible.

Last month, the trial for my mother in laws dog was brought to court - the prosecutor decided to simply ask for a muzzle order for the dog instead. I was devestated. When I turned to my husband for emotional support for this, he just shut me out. Again that weekend I went to my moms - and in a phone call he told me he had been for dinner at his mothers - with the dog there, a day after the hard news for me. I told him I was upset that he would go there and see the dog, not even asking her to at least put it outside. He hung up on me.

I have been trying for the last week or so to get him to understand how badly I have been hurt by his mother and but his lack of support (I feel that he should have stood up to her and made her do what is right - and he feels he cannot persecute her for making one bad decision because he has seen her do so much good for others). I feel extremely slighted by this - like he would much rather me suffer - even though my son and I are the victims here - than tell her mother something she will not like: to apologize to us and get rid of the biting dog (which he has now admitted to me has behavioural problems).

At this point - I feel like I cannot try to make him understand anymore - he truly believes that he has been supportive enough of me because he asked once or twice what was going on with the courts and has told me that I need to just get over this and if I cant I need professional help.

I feel sick about the way he is acting, and I feel like I want to leave him. Am I overreacting? Sorry for the LONG post...