Sisabel, it's not easy to raise a child and no one is "perfect" at it either. I can think about things I would have done differently myself. I did read different books, read about child development and I had to learn about dyslexia because my child has dyslexia. There are plenty of "good" parents that end up having challenges with their children despite their efforts to be a good parent.

A parent is often the one a child tests the most too. Most parents finally get appreciated when their own child finally experiences the actual challenges of what it means to raise a child for themselves. And even when a parent is caring and is a good parent, their child will be exposed to piers that can hurt them and present them with "toxic" behaviors that create deep injuries. Also, a parent can have a child that is challenged that is misunderstood and the child slips through the cracks hurt because they had a challenge where instead of being helped they were picked on or punished. A parent can try very hard to help their child develop self esteem only to have some teacher or a pier group destroy their self esteem too.

We have learned a great deal about child development in just the past ten years. So if a child had some kind of challenge and now they are older they can see "their" problem and decide how bad their parent was because they failed to get the help they needed. Also, there is no guarantee that a parent and child will bond either. A child may have some kind of attachment disorder that confuses the parent. And a parent may have problems themselves, a major health challenge, perhaps a parent develops depression or some kind of MI that makes being a parent more challenging. I myself struggled with endometriosis and that was a huge challenge for me and I had such a hard time with PMS because when I got my period it was like having more than one uterus producing hormones in my body. Now they know more about this challenge and how debilitating it can be, but when I struggled with it I was blamed for whatever I failed to do in "just" functioning normally. I did the best I could, and I was not perfect, no one ever is.

From what you have shared, your daughter has been influenced by her piers and has decided to use drugs and "escape" life instead of learning how to engage and be responsible. Your daughter doesn't respect you or appreciate the things you do for her either. Actually, it sounds like she has learned how to manipulate you into giving in and allowing her to have the power and control. That is what you experienced when she came to your home with her husband and just expected you to provide food and alcohol and wait on her.

Ok, you were not perfect and you have apologized, but that doesn't mean your daughter deserves to have all this power over you.

The one I feel sorry for is the baby. And I will be honest with you in that if I saw the parents getting drunk and abusing alcohol around that baby I would be reporting it to DCYF. If your daughter's home is filthy and her and her husband are abusing alcohol constantly around that child, then that child needs help and Child Services may need to intervene. I have myself anonymously reported child neglect. Being drunk around a baby is WRONG and very dangerous. And it will get even more dangerous when that baby begins to explore because the mother might be too drunk and the baby can get into something dangerous. Truth is NOW there are a lot of children that see their parents overdose. Alcoholism is an extremely narcissistic and selfish disease and NO child deserves to suffer with alcoholic parents. Think about it, if YOU and YOUR husband are uncomfortable around your daughter and her husband think about how it will be for an innocent baby and child. So, "please" seriously consider sharing your concerns with child services and you CAN report anonymously.