Excellent advice, WC. He called today -about my mother's estate planning and was calm- and said he sent me an email about this because he won't be able to make it to the attorney's appointment with my mom (I'm going). I'll take advantage of that email to tell him what you have advised here and then some. Thank you so much.

I'm so so sorry you're going through such a rough time. I admire you (well, I always admire you) for pushing through no matter the circumstances. I know what it's like to have crushing chronic pain on top of everything else, and it makes everything more difficult. I so hope things get better for you!