First, I am sorry that this is distressing to you; it would be to me as well. I've dealt with this kind of thing in the past, and during my early therapy experiences as I reclaimed my childhood from its violent beginnings and began to heal.

Your T can be of help but we can be, as well. You will find support here ....well, mixed with the occasional nuttiness and judgment. You know who you are. Just kidding!

I would ALSO urge you to begin to develop strategies to ground yourself. Yes, that sounds woo-woo, but a couple things that have worked for me. Breathing exercises. Having special objects around. Drinking a beverage (n/a) that brings you back to the sensory world -- it could be herbal tea or could be a smoothie or something else, hopefully not too sugary or stimulating. Stretching or yoga is helpful to some people. For me, it's hard to beat time in nature or being with my dog. Music? Contact with the earth or a beloved stuffed animal (at any age!).

I wish you the best and I know that I am not alone.