Well heck. I feel bad wanting to actually discuss my session today. Ah well.

It was season 3 with new T today. I guess, I don't know that I like her. She asked me at the end of the last session to do a DBT diary card. She seems to be all gung ho for trying DBT with fidelity with me. The last T who tried discussed skills like, once maybe. I decided that doing the diary card was going to be BS, so I made my own mood tracker inspired by the traditional diary card. T seemed to be a big fan.

She spent some time looking over my journal, and made an interesting connection. Friday I was really struggling, but she proposed that I was just super triggered from Thursday when I attended this 2.5 hour training at work on trauma informed care. So what did I think about? My own childhood traumas.

She noted that I didn't seem super excited to be at therapy. That I never am, and often get disregulated afterwards. I explained that while I don't disagree that skill building will be good for me, I also need someone to give me a hug and tell me they love me.

"You want to feel supported. I get that. Also, I feel like if I did try to hug you that you might punch me."

She recommended some kind of positive reinforcement to help me associate therapy with a good thing instead of terrible therapy feelings. H later recommended cheesecake.

We spent the last 20 minutes talking about some DBT skills, which led to a conversation about my a-hole AP at work and what it looks like when someone brushes their teeth.

ETA: I am feeling very vulnerable in having really begun therapy with someone who isn't my old T and I get that there's drama, but support or feedback would be appreciated if you feel it appropriate.