I and my wife want to purchase long-term care insurance.

My being bipolar wasn't a problem to the underwriters, because we're known for ending our lives prematurely, which is definitely to the advantage of long-term care insurers.

The salesman called back today and asked me what medications I'm taking. I take Seroquel to guarantee adequate sleep, but he told me that since Seroquel is classified as an antipsychotic, I am disqualified from coverage.

I explained to him that I take Seroquel to sleep, and if I was psychotic, I wouldn't be talking with him on the phone because I'd be busy running naked around the neighborhood punching mailboxes off their posts.

He said no dice, which made me so angry that I took off my clothes and started on the mailboxes.