Well my head is still in a spin with thoughts racing, ideas flowing (too many to act on any it seems), obsessing over certain things like my diagnosis and prognosis, and oddly feeling happy too. Last year really did my head in.

Saw my T for the first time in weeks and he explained and stressed to me the seriousness of my illness. I feel like I will be able to recover from Bipolar if I put my mind to it. He disagrees. I’m not sure what to believe.

So many people around me think I’m either using my illness as an excuse to go to hospital regularly (as I apparently must like it - sigh), or they thing the whole thing is an act. This confuses me. I either have the worst case diagnosis for Bipolar or I’m making it all up for some sick reason. All mental health professionals around me confirm the diagnosis but I’m still confused by what others say. My mind obsesses over this so much I can’t think straight.

Can I really recover with strong will power and revelation? I’m going to try.