I feel the same way elliecake

I was only just diagnosed at 25 and I keep feeling like I'm just using it as an excuse to not work my hardest. It scares me to think that I'm making it up for whatever reason and makes me feel like I'm an awful person. when I'm feeling normal it's hard to remember the times where I was catatonic and couldn't get out of bed.

Sometimes it also feels like the medication is making me worse and that because I keep thinking I don't have it or that I was misdiagnosed, I get scared that the meds are going to hurt me.

I'm sure I'll remember why I got diagnosed when I go into a depressive mood again but it is still really hard to believe you're just doing it for an excuse. I hope you start feeling better