This is so stupid.

My pdoc said I have bipolar and to take my meds. I said, "No, these meds are going to give me dementia or Alzheimer's." Then he said, "People with bipolar generally don't live long enough to reach dementia, so you have nothing to worry about."

WTF

FTR, my grandma had dementia and bipolar, but in all fairness, she wasn't on any APs until toward the end of her life. This leads me to believe that my grandma would have never lived long enough to reach dementia if she had taken APs. (i.e., she would have died long before she reached the 76 year old mark when she first started exhibiting signs of dementia.)

But my dad doesn't have bipolar, nor does my mom. So what's the point in connecting me to my grandma? I think that's a lie excuse on my pdoc's part. Plus, he just wants to control my mind. He's trying to implant devices in my head via meds. I don't trust him and I will NEVER take these devices (i.e., "meds") again. He can lock me up all he wants, but I'm never going to take them because I know how this game is played.

Oh, and to add to the pain... my phone murdered itself in its sleep 2 nights ago, so I can't even talk to my therapist or text anyone. I have to wait until I get a new phone. The motherboard apparently stopped working and there's NO WAY TO RECOVER ANYTHING according to the people in the Verizon store. So now I've lost everyone's phone number and all of my pictures. I am seething.

Sorry for the rant.