I too am a recovering alcoholic. AA was not for me either I only have three years sober but what I have found that works for me is. I realized I drank to self medicate and control my symptoms of bipolar. Once I new what was wrong with me and I got on medication my will to drink stopped. I sometimes still think of a drink but what I say to myself would I drink bleach? Alcohol for me would be like drinking bleach I would eventually end up dead.