I totally understand that feeling. But she wouldn't have given you the number if she didn't want you to use it and it is easier to help you the less you have traveled down the episode road. Tonight it might be more Seroquel or something; by tomorrow it could be harder to treat. And I know that when I have decided not to contact my pdoc to not "bug her yet again" and then have been awake and scary manic all night I have really regretted it because I knew that night made me worse than I might have been.

I'm glad your mom is watching you and helping.