I'm afraid I wouldn't know what to suggest beyond what is probably the obvious... talking all of this through at-length & in-depth with a mental health therapist. Perhaps you're already doing that? However here are links to 4 articles, from PC's archives, on the subject of attachment that (hopefully) may be of some help:
What Is Attachment and Why Is It Important?
What's My Attachment Style and Why Does It Matter? | Happily Imperfect
How to Change Your Attachment Style
What Is an Anxious Attachment Style and How Can I Change It? | Happily Imperfect
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"I may be older but I am not wise / I'm still a child's grown-up disguise / and I never can tell you what you want to know / You will find out as you go." (from: "A Nightengale's Lullaby" - Julie Last)
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