I read in one of my pdoc's reports that he thought I had 'traits' of histrionic personality disorder. It made me feel like I was being blamed for acting out while manic in front of him. I did some pretty weird things though. I find myself often thinking that if I did such and such, which this other person I know is doing, people would call the police to come to my house and take me away.

I don't have the personal freedom we imagine ourselves to have in western democracies. If i step outside of my car in my neighborhood, my neighbor M will be banging on my door the next mornign to check if I am ok. If I want to take a walk, I have to drive somewhere else and walk.