Hello ejo: Thank you for sharing your concern here on PC.  I noticed this is your first post. So... welcome to Psych Central. 
I'm sorry there is not a lot I can offer with regard to your concern. Hopefully there will be other members who will have some thoughts they can share. In the meantime, however, here are links to 4 articles, from Psych Central's archives, that (hopefully) may be of some help:
FAQs for Partners of Sex Addicts
6 Stages of Recovery for Partners of Sex Addicts
Why Partners of Sex Addicts Get Sick: A Vicious Circle | The Impact of Sex Addiction
Recovery in Partners of Sex Addicts | The Impact of Sex Addiction
I hope you find PC to be of benefit. 
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"I may be older but I am not wise / I'm still a child's grown-up disguise / and I never can tell you what you want to know / You will find out as you go." (from: "A Nightengale's Lullaby" - Julie Last)
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