I am 36 years old and am in a happy marriage with my partner of 3.5 years. My wife is cool and we get along. Our sex life feels healthy and natural, even though it doesn't measure up to popular statistics. We also share a spiritual practice, and feel connected in that way as well.

I have a problem that started several months ago in which I became attracted to a woman at work. It almost boiled over into a real emotional affair, but we dodged the bullet together (not without a ton of fighting ).

Since then I have tried to disclose attractions as they occur, with varying success. I find it really embarrassing to admit that I am attracted to other women, and I'm also ashamed, and often when these attractions occur, there seems to be an equal part of resentment or dislike that arises in me and is directed at my wife. She doesn't like that. Neither do I. She understands that it is normal to get attracted to other people but doesn't get the part about my dislike/resentment towards her when I get attracted to other women. She thinks it is because deep down I don't really want to be in this commitment.

Has anyone else experienced this? Does anyone want to weigh in on this situation? We would be glad to hear what others think about the situation.

Thank you