Hello Mat,

I've been wondering how you've been doing. And I'm not sure there is such a thing as "living normally". There are many excellent suggestions above, and I'm going to add my 2 cents.

First of all, "just the normal things you worry about" might bear some exploration. Worrying constantly is not pleasant. And not that you have to post them here, but - what are they? There are posters who have offered to let you PM them if you want to talk, so you are not actually without people to talk to. Why not give it a try with them? Get more specific?

Also, there is no question there is a cognitive and perhaps genetic element to depression, but neither condemns you to a living hell on earth. Especially the cognitive stuff, like looking for a positive or 2 about your life, your self, something you're grateful for, can be uplifting. And I would add not to overwhelm yourself - just try a baby step. See how it feels.

Many hugs - I'm wishing you well.