I feel so depressed
t saw me on his day off

but I found it hard to talk and make eye contact

t gave me some stuff to help with the shower flashbacks. t and I talked about how me being sexually active again triggered me. I said I wasn't ready and it wasn't with a good person either. t said having sex again is a big step for survivors even if it is with a good caring and understanding person

I don't want to ever have sex again.

t said it seems like I am totally cut off from everyone around me. I said yeah

t seems sad when I'm not well. I can see in his eyes. they look watery. I asked for a hug and he said yes. we hugged and I laid my head on his shoulder... he sighed a bit.

I left and felt bad for wasting ts time on his day off. I sent an email apologizing. t wrote back to my email and wrote a supportive message. he said I have every reason to feel bad but I need to take breaks from the intensity.. t said I need good things in my life

I don't feel I have any though. except boby