I apologize for the long post, but I've been needing to open up about this for some time and I am looking for your love and support.

I have suffered from Bi-Polar II disorder for as long as I can remember. When given a written or verbal quiz from mental health professionals to flush out whether or not I qualify as having this disorder, the answer is always undoubtedly the same... Yes.

For years, I have coped with my various mental disorders by abusing narcotics. As many of you can relate to, I began to become addicted not only to the dangerous substances I was abusing, but also the destructive and violent lifestyle that accompanies active addiction.

My days would blend together in a mess of completely unorganized madness. The interesting thing about that reality was this. I became so used to the chaos that I began to enjoy it. It became the only thing I knew. My ups and downs went from a predictable carousel to the extreme highs and lows of mountain tops and valleys. My soul was being eroded and my death was slowly coming into view.

After suffering 3 overdoses in a single month, the reality of the situation finally hit me. I buckled down and crafted my own recovery program. This program included getting on MAT (medicated assisted treatment), reading recovery literature, going to group therapy sessions, going to AA/NA meetings, getting a therapist, changing my phone number, and never ever making contact with my drug dealers ever again.

This was a huge victory in itself and really helped to address my SUD (substance use disorder). I stayed sober... Not a single slip up. The longest period of sobriety since age 13.

Not to overshadow this great victory, but my Bi-Polar II disorder really began to take hold at this point. This led me to start medication treatment and that has had a profound and wonderful impact on me, my relationships, and my life as a whole.

Lately, I've been working really hard in establishing structure to my life in order to cope with this disorder and allow myself to live a more centered and focused life. I have a journal and I write constantly. I have joined this forum and have been met with more love and support than I ever could have imagined. I have established a routine and for the first time ever I keep a date book. I make lists. I try to keep a consistent daily schedule.

All these things have been wonderful, yet I am still looking for ways, tips, tricks to living a more structured and purposeful life. What has been most impact in your life? Even with medication, how do you do it day in and day out? No suggestion is a bad one, I promise. I am looking for anything and everything.

I don't ever want to go back there, but I would like some insight on blazing the trail moving forward.