So it turns out that it is really hard to donate a body. You'd think it would be easy since there is so much need but oh no. I've spent 5 days on this and so far one place couldn't take him because of the tubes he has, another couldn't get a funeral home to work with them, a third doesn't work in that state and tomorrow I'll call what I suspect is the last option.

I'm tired and cranky tonight. My therapist helped but he'll be able to help more next week when I'm not trying so hard to keep it together. I need to do that right now more than I need to fall completely apart. there is time to fall apart and that is next week. He did approve of my going to say goodbye but said I should not go with m brother to the house if my brother does go as he insists he needs to. I'm just overwhelmed by not being able to find a way to donate. Donations are needed badly so it's hard to believe its nearly impossible to set up.

Oh well. Tomorrow I go to the city where my brother lives and then Wednesday is goodbye day. I have one thing I want to say and that's all I need. I just want to go, do it and come home. If my brother insists on going to the home that adds hours to the already long trip.

I want Wednesday over with. Badly.