I'm so sorry, therealme It is not your fault. It's clear you're trying your absolute best, and I'm sure your wife knows that as well. Please don't be so hard on yourself. I know things are pretty bad right now, but they can get better. Feel free to cry if you need. Crying can help a lot when we're stressed out. Please don't give up. You can do this! You're strong, I'm sure of that. Feel free to PM me anytime. Let me know if I can do something to help. Sending many hugs to you