Quote:
Originally Posted by DP_2017
LT
It's nice he replied. Most T's and decent humans would be supportive of someone doing something good for themselves. You are right though, you need to do it for you. It's ok to have support along the way, cheerleaders and such but it has to be for you. I hope you are able to do that
I feel like, and maybe I'm off, but you seem to constantly seek approval from him. I'm unsure why? Part of a T's job is to be supportive and non judging, he has proved time and time again, that he is ok with you. I wouldn't expect much different from a T. I think, and I lack this too so it's not judgmental, you need to find some true and real self love. You need to approve yourself. I struggle with it too but I'm trying, making a list of things that scare me that I want to do and things that can build my confidence. I don't hate myself but I sure don't love myself.
Hopefully in time, we can both get to that place where we can love ourselves and approve of ourselves and achieve the goals we want for ourselves. Good luck to you with it all
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I do tend to look for approval from authority figures in general (which includes the T category), and I have from this T before. But I don't feel in this instance it was so much looking for approval as support. That I felt in some of what he was saying during session, it was almost like "Yeah, that won't work." It's like I want him to think I'm strong enough to do certain things. I feel like maybe I didn't get that from my parents (well, particularly my mom). She focused on my mistakes, not my successes. I think I just want T to be kind of like, "Yeah, I know you can do it, you've got this!" Like...I don't know, a parent cheering on their kid when they're at bat in a softball/baseball game (I was never good at sports, so maybe that's not the best comparison). Pretty sure that next session we'll at least spend some time discussing what's going on in my wanting him to have faith in me, so I'll probably be able to explain it more then.