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Old Jan 23, 2019, 08:49 PM
guilloche guilloche is offline
Magnate
 
Member Since: Jun 2014
Location: US
Posts: 2,734
Quote:
Originally Posted by seeker33 View Post
When I read, it's only about psychology- not suitable for small talk with adults at the shop and definitely not suitable for small talk with my young teen students.
I don't think this is true at all. And, I think that THESE kinds of topics are EXACTLY what makes someone interesting to talk to.

I mean, if you just stick to TV, or the weather, or sports... that's all sort of... well, there's not much "meat" there for conversation. If you start to talk about psychology (it doesn't have to be "what's wrong with people" psychology, you could talk about personality, how people interpret things going on around them, what methods are effective for self-improvement, what new discoveries you've recently heard about and how people are reacting to them!) - or philosophy (oh my goodness if somebody approached me and started chatting about philosophy, I think I'd do backflips of joy, and think they were the most non-boring person ever!)

Maybe being "interesting" is partly being willing to take a conversational risk and broach some of these topics. Sometimes you'll strike out, it won't resonate with the other person, but other times you might just find yourself in an amazing, fun, unbelievable conversation!

I just wouldn't bop somebody over the head with heavy hitting topics too quickly, unless you know them well and know they're interested in that stuff. You start small, dangle a little bit of conversation out there and see if they show interest.

I also happen to think that what you're already doing is GREAT - when you let other people talk, they tend to see you as less boring, because most people love to talk about themselves.

I don't know. I guess I also (since you asked, lol, sorry!) think there's not really such a thing as a "boring person". When I'm with some people, I look insanely boring. With some people, I just end up not quite connecting - so the conversation fizzles. The things that interest me are useless to them, or we can't figure out a good pattern for talking (i.e. one person talks too much, the other person can't get a word in). With other people, I practically sparkle with oddity and interestingness. It's not really me, I'm not that interesting - it's just a good match between me and the person I'm talking to (I think).

BTW re: TV, have you seen/heard of the show "The Good Place"? The theme of the show is built around moral philosophy (they even discuss philosophers during the first season). I don't know if you'd like - it's a very silly comedy. But, it's also got this cool vein of philosophy running through it, and asks the question, "What does it really mean to be a 'good' person?" - if you were interested in talking philosophy with people, that might be a good way "in". It sort of makes it more palatable (I think) to people who wouldn't otherwise give philosophy much thought.

Just some random thoughts... Good luck!
Hugs from:
MickeyCheeky, seeker33
Thanks for this!
MickeyCheeky, seeker33