I started hitting my leg really hard because I want to feel pain. My hand hurts but if I were to be fine after, I'd light myself on fire all the time to feel intense pain. I think it's because I'm not exercising enough. I want to burn my arms with a lighter or cut myself for pleasure. I want excitement and stimulation. I want to be a powerful entity and destroy peoples possessions and take their money and make them feel miserable so they can start a better life for change and wake them up. I want to suffocate. I want to get into a fight. For fun.