I know what you mean, Sisabel. I'm sure many people here on PC can relate to what you wrote. But I'm glad you've finally realized this! Now that you know what the problem is, you can finally start taking some action, like you're doing already. Be proud of yourself for that. I'm sure things will get better now. Just take it one step at the time. It's not easy to change a behavior that you've had for so many years. Please don't give up. You can do this! You're strong, I know that. Feel free to PM me anytime. Let me know if I can do something to help. Sending many hugs to you